Christmas shopping

When Christmas shopping I find tons of stuff I would get my ex best friend….the love of this girl s life.

But I also made him art and things from my heart and I would just think how it is all thrown in the garbage . I think about how most likely my art I made for him is trashed . It is stuff I have never given any one before. Never my art.

My heart starts to break at the thought of it trashed. I tend to let my mind go wild and put things together even though it is a happy moment at first then I start letting my mind wander.

I made him a box of rocks . Each rock was places I have been in my life. I would write on it a saying about what i felt about our relationship or him. I would take a rock from a new place I went to and keep it. It was to represent to him no matter where I am he had a piece of me and my experience. Because what I wanted most of all was him to be part of it because i loved him that much……

I still collect those rocks. And they are waiting for him to take some day.

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